Is Love a Feeling

Valentine's Day is fast approaching.  The day we celebrate love.  There many verses in the Bible that speak of love.  Here are a few.

Luke 6:35  But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked.

1 Corinthians 13:4  Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

Galatians 5:22  But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,

Have you ever looked at the way the Bible uses the word love?  It doesn't say 'do this and you will feel love'.  Most of the time when the word love is used it is an action word.  It is not a feeling.  God commands us to love one another.  He didn't say feel love for one another.  He said do it.  Does that mean we have to love when we don't feel it?  Yes, that is exactly what it means.  We are commanded to love, love, and then love again.  No one is commanded to love us.  (Remember the Bible is a letter to us.) 

Since Valentine's Day is approaching, it would be a good time to love--even when we don't feel it.  I would like to challenge you to show love to someone in your life, even if you don't feel it.  Here are a few ideas.  Leave them a note or a card that celebrates something about them.  I had a friend who put a note in her husband's lunch box every day.  My husband has left notes on my dashboard.  Try it for a week and see if something changes.  There is something about receiving an unexpected note that brings joy to the heart and softens hard edges.  How would a love note to that difficult teenager touch his or her heart?  Not a gushy, mushy note.  Just a note that says, "Hey son, I'm glad God sent you to me."  Or maybe, "You are still my baby."  "My life became brighter the day you were born."  And to that mate who is difficult to love, yes there are some, "Thanks for your help around the house."  "Thanks for providing for me and the children."  "I appreciate your service at church and in the community." 

Everyone wants to be appreciated.  Let's determine to appreciate a loved one next week.  Let's show love and not 'wait' for the love.

When Love Is Not Love

There is an old saying that goes: If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck, it must be a duck.  Not necessarily.  The picture on the left looks like a duck.  When pulled, it will make a noise like a duck.  Ask any child over 2 years old what it is and he will tell you "A duck."  Is it a duck?

If you ask this little boy what he is doing, he will say, "Riding my horse."  Is he?  He thinks he is.  With his imagination, he can go all over the country and capture many bad guys on that horse. 

You and I can see that it is not a real horse.  And we can see the duck is not a real duck.  Why?  Because we are adults and know the difference in real and make believe?  It seems that some women don't.

They live by the old Sandy Posey song Born a Woman.  The song said, "Stepped on, lied to, cheated on and treated like dirt.  If you're born a woman, you're born to be hurt."  There are women that allow some man to leave them for another woman only to completely forgive and take him back when he cries.  "Hey, everybody makes mistakes."  Your right.  They do.  What about the second or third time he does it?  "But he said he loved me."  Yes he did.  Would she take him back if he said, "By the way, I don't love you, but I need a place to crash for a while because the other woman threw me out"?  Or maybe "I don't love you, but I need your money"?  "Well no.  That would be stupid."  You are right, it would.  He knows that.  So what does he do?  He does what he does best.  He LIES.  Why?  Because it works.  It gets him what he wants.  Her friends try to tell her.  Does she listen?  No.  She stands up for him and proclaims his valor.  Then she tells her friends, "You just don't understand him." 

What does the Bible say about true love?

And Jacob served seven years for Rachel; and they seemed unto him but a few days, for the love he had to her.  Genesis 29:20.   Remember that Jacob had already worked seven years for Rachel.  He was lied to and cheated out of his fair wages.  Yet he agreed to work another seven years for her.

And if the servant shall plainly say, I love my master, my wife, and my children; I will not go out free:Exodus 21:5  This verse says that a man should love his wife and children enough to give up freedom to be with them.

When is love not really love? 

• When it treats you with disrespect. 
• When it puts anything above your feelings.
• When it asks you to give up something you love.
• When it offers false hope.
• When it offers false apologies.
• When it harms someone you love.
 

 

What Is Love?

When my children were growing up, I would tell them, "I have to do what is best for you, even when it is not easy on me or you."  Many times it would have been easier to give in to their request or ignore inappropriate behavior.  But if we love someone, taking 'easy street' is not in their best interest.  In fact it is self-indulgent.

Christ certainly didn't take the easy way out when he died on the cross for our sins.  The old song said, "He could have called 10,000 angels.  But He died for you and He died for me."  If we want to show the kind of love that Christ showed us, we need to be willing to sacrifice ourselves for our loved ones' best interest.

As most of you know, my mother-in-law just passed away.  She was a wonderful woman in many ways, but irresponsible with finances and health.  To do what was in her best interest, I obtained complete control of her finances and medical decisions.  It was not easy to go through the legal channels, but the end result was that I was able to place her in an assisted living facility which extended her life by at least five years.  These facilities are not cheap and there is no way she could have afforded it if she had access to funds.  I did what I had to do to care for her.  She understood and after an adjustment period, appreciated it.  (The nurses would laugh and tell me that if they asked her to make a decision, her answer was always "Call Theresa.")

I am now faced with another 'opportunity to serve' but at great sacrifice.  This task will be much harder, but if I am to show the love of Christ, I must be willing to go to whatever lengths necessary to provide care for some one who is unable to recognize the need.  I will tell you more about this situation in later posts.  Please pray for me as I do the research and make the decisions necessary.